Many autistic individuals have several coping mechanisms and tactics in place that allow them to experience the world in a more productive way. Often, as children, we do not yet understand what bothers or overstimulates us. As we learn more about ourselves, we do. Self-awareness is key to change and growth. And awareness is a natural part of human evolution--even for autistic individuals. Some of us evolve more than others. Some of us are more self-determined than others. This is not a positive or a negative, it just is. Autism is as individual as fingerprints: if you've met one autistic person, you've met one autistic person.
A trademark of autism is uneven skills (ex: successful at a job of high status, yet lacking self-care skills, or smooth at conversing on specific topics, yet at a loss when the subject changes). Just as the rest of the human race, autistic people also show variance in personalities. As anyone else, we navigate our way through life with our own unique personal challenges. So why are many people stumped when autistic individuals exhibit differences amongst each other? Are all deaf people the same? No. Are all blue-eyed people the same? No. Are all autistic people the same? No.
Background, community, education-level, family relations, life experiences, etc. all play just as much a part in the autistic person's life as in any other human's life. Boxing autism into categories of severity or appearance is a strong contributor to the lack of diagnosis (or misdiagnosis) in females. This also applies to males.